What we “think”, we “create”. In other words, what we “perceive” becomes “reality”. We have much more control than we realize, or perhaps,
we have more influence on the outcome than we want to accept responsibility for.
The way we perceive the outer world can be a direct reflection of our inner selves. A “mirror” to the inner workings of our minds. If the inner self is unhappy, angry, unbalanced, depressed or frustrated, then we tend to see everything as an annoyance or an obstacle which can’t be overcome. We remain “stuck” because we fail to realize that we have complete control over how we choose to perceive things. The internal messages are self-defeating in nature and there is a sense of “victim-hood”. When this “coping strategy” has persisted for some time, it becomes a habit that can actually feel comforting because it is familiar. We are reluctant to try alternate approaches in facing problems, perhaps because we haven’t learned any other way. The people around us respond to this negativity and actually feed us more chaos without realizing it, because that is what we are inadvertently “teaching” them to do.
Consider the middle-school child who is often sent to the principal for clowning around in class. His teachers, parents, and peers continually complain about his behavior, labeling him as a trouble-maker and reminding him frequently that if he keeps to his current ways, he will amount to nothing, or maybe end up in jail someday. The messages become so ingrained that they actually become his OWN “self-talk”, and this will likely result in living up to exactly the expectations everyone (now including himself) has laid out for him. For many adults, we’re still feeding ourselves that negative self-image deeply ingrained from our childhoods, or from a major failure in the past.
“No problem can be solved from the same level of consciousness that created it.” – Unknown
On the other hand, the balanced and positive mind will tend to perceive a major setback very differently. Suppose the person with the “positive mind” receives notice that they’ve been fired, and arrives home to find they’re out of propane for heat in the middle of January. There will surely be anger and frustration, but it will quickly be followed by self-talk such as,
“I really disliked that job anyway. This could be the chance for me to start that business I’ve been dreaming of. If I need money until I get it underway, I have a great skills and a few places to inquire with for a new job. I’m going to dig out my resume right now and polish it up just in case. I’ve been through worse and I’m still lucky to have a roof over my head and the things I truly need. Many people struggle with much more than this every day. I’ll call the propane company and see if they will work out a payment plan with me. Tonight, I’ll fire up the kerosene heater. It was really smart to buy that heater when I did. I can handle this.”
The person with the “negative mind” would have reacted very differently. More along the lines of:
“For crying out loud! I can’t take ONE more thing! Why does all this sh*t happen to ME? How am I supposed to fill the propane tank if I have no money coming in now? I should have taken that other job last year instead of this one! I have no one to help me. I’m losing everything! I am such a failure”.
“We are what we think, all that we are arises with our thoughts, with our thoughts we make the world.” – Gautama Buddha
The great news is that we CAN control how we choose to perceive things and how we will manifest our desires. We can choose how we will respond outwardly, and whether the inner messages we give ourselves will be self-destructive, or self-empowering! Positive manifests positive, and I know this to be true from my own experiences in escaping some of the darkest recesses, and hopeless depths imaginable. Abundance, success and healing is available to each of us, but they all begin, or end, with us.
So, how does a person know if they are “thinking themselves into destruction”, or “creating negativity and lack of opportunity”? When people give you helpful suggestions, try “listening” to your inner thoughts or verbal responses. If you’re responding with things like, “I’ve tried that and it didn’t work”, “I can’t because (fill in the blank)“, “Yes that’s good, but (list some negative view here)“, “I should have (fill in the blank) a long time ago, and then I would be able to (fill in the blank) now”.
Or, you can try this simple “test” right now. Simply complete the sentence below with the first things that come to mind regarding what you have just read in this article:
This article was ________________ because ________________________________________.
If you completed the sentence above with something like, “this article was a waste of my time because it’s all a load of crap”, then perhaps. like many people, you have some things you’d like to work on as well. Whatever your choice may be, I thank you for taking the time to read my post this far.
Here are some strategies you can begin trying right now to think your way to creating positive change! If you notice any differences after practicing a little while, please let me hear from you in the comments.
- When something devastating does happen, allow yourself to grieve. Journal about it, have a good cry, yell in a private room, draw dark and hateful images – let it out in a safe place (not Facebook!) – do whatever it takes, within reason, to release the hurt and anger with the goal of moving to the next step and seeking solutions. It’s okay to have a bit of a pity party if it’s followed up with positive action. If you find yourself unleashing emotions you’re unable to handle or control, if you feel you may harm yourself or others, or if you begin to feel NO emotion at all, please consider seeking a licensed counselor to help you through it.
- Listen to your thoughts and words, and practice turning each negative or “stop statement” into something hopeful or positive. Stop statements (like “I can’t”) instantly put a halt on creative thinking and problem solving. Instead of, “I can’t possibly pay this bill”, try “What can I do to cover this bill?”. Sometimes, simply turning it around in your mind will jar your subconscious mind into beginning the process of finding solutions.
- Give yourself credit for things you have accomplished. Rather than rehashing your mistakes (mentally or out loud), focus on the things you’ve done well. Realize it isn’t fair to beat yourself up for wrong choices you have made while learning your way through life. Guilt serves no purpose. Self-bashing for past mistakes is not much different than scolding a toddler for falling down while he is learning to walk.
- When feeling overwhelmed and helpless, think of just one major life obstacle you made it through successfully. I’ll bet you can list several, so, all of the strength and wisdom you need to tackle this one is already inside you, too! Practice being your own personal cheerleader.
- Treat yourself well, as if you’re nurturing and caring for one of your loved ones. If you wouldn’t tolerate someone mistreating your child, why would you allow someone (including yourself) to mistreat you? You are worthy of respect and good care. Take yourself on a “date” now and then to indulge in something you enjoy.
- Start your day with one positive affirmation and statement of gratitude. “Just for today I will not worry. I will enjoy my life.” Or, “I am grateful for the freedom I have. I am lucky to have x, y and z”. You might start an abundance journal or read daily motivational quotes.
- Allow yourself to dream, and dream big! Create a vision board or a file on your computer with images and notes describing where you want to be, what you want to have, and then visualize yourself having those things and living that life. Jot down ways you could explore to achieve them. Work at it – one step at a time.
- Consider that if everything were always easy and simple, we wouldn’t have any reason to appreciate the end of a struggle, or the work we put towards something we achieved. For an example, just think how uneventful and boring the season of spring would be, had you not experienced the long, cold months of winter.
It is my hope that the tidbits of wisdom, guidance, resources, and genuine care and support I wish to offer through Back to Natural Now will help you facilitate positive change in your own life. Please remember that negative patterns are often developed over long periods of time, and even though the solutions are simple, the “fix” won’t happen overnight. With practice, however, creating positive change can become “second nature”.
I’d like to hear your thoughts and tips in the comments below. If you would like to share this post, here is a shortened link for social media: http://wp.me/p8k0Ec-Q